Counting Points
by omidorichan
Summary: Valentine's Day has come once again, and how does Remus feel about it? A shortbutsweet oneshot.


**Counting Points**

Remus remembered Valentine's Day at Hogwarts. It was a day of flirting. It was a day of mystery. It was a day of love and fancy. It was a day he loathed.

Every year, Sirius and James would get about a hundred Valentines each, and then start a contest between themselves to see who got the most. Over time, this game had developed a point system. One point for a simple card. Two points for a desperate declaration of love. Ten points for anything X-rated. And, of course, Remus was always left as the scorekeeper.

"'_Dearest Sirius,'"_ his friend read with a dramatic tone. _"'My heart longs only for you! You are the sunshine that fills the sky, and when you are not around, I wonder why. Why, why, why! I love you so, Sirius dear, and I am only happy when you are near! Love, Mathalda.'"_

Sirius dissolved into laughter on his bed, falling onto the pile of red and pink papers that he had strewn all over. James groaned loudly.

"Negative thirty points for terrible poetry!" he cried.

Remus shook his head. "No, technically it was a declaration of love, so that brings him up to sixty-four points."

James made an uncouth sound to express his annoyance. "Fine!" he said, lifting up a sparkling red heart. "How about this one? '_James Potter, I hope you rot in hell! Love, Elmira.'_" He paused and stared at the card. "What?"

Sirius sniggered at him. "Now who is getting negative points? Dock 'em, Moony!"

Remus sighed and erased a line on his notebook, dropping James back to: "Fifty-nine."

James whined about this, of course, explaining that the card was good-looking enough itself to get him at least two points. Sirius shushed him and picked up a small white card.

"'_Sirius. I love you so much but I am afraid to tell you because I am scared that you will reject me. I don't even know why I am writing this card. Oh, well. Happy Valentine's Day. Love forever and secretly, Me.'_ Why, James, I had no idea you felt that way!"

"Shut up!"

"Two points for declaration of love, Sirius up to sixty-six points." Remus said emotionlessly. He scribbled some designs in the margin and glanced at his watch. They had been at this for an hour and a half, and he would be lucky to get away in time for dinner with the way things were going. As his stomach growled he wondered why he let them talk him into these things, but before he could think about it too much, something interrupted his train of thought.

"Hey, Remus! This one's for you!" Sirius tossed a large white envelope over to Remus. Barely daring to believe it, he opened it carefully and pulled out a beautifully embossed pink card that had white ribbon tied at the side. It smelt of roses.

"Open it, Moony! Read it to us!"

Remus cleared his throat. "_'To my dear Remus. I know we have never spoken of this before, but I feel that now would be the ideal time to share this with you. I love you, Remus. More than words can say. Every moment that I have kept this secret has been pure torture for me. Remus, I know you feel the same way about me. I know that once we are alone you want to have lots of hot, dirty—'_" Remus blanched at what came next and stopped reading. This was most definitely a ten-pointer. He skimmed down to the end of the card that was signed, lavishly, _Sirius Sexy-Pants Black_.

"You arse!" he yelled, and began to get up so he could beat Sirius with his clipboard. His friend, who was rolling around on his bed of Valentines, gasping for air and holding his stomach, managed to blurt out: "look in the envelope!"

Remus looked inside the envelope and pulled out a photograph of Sirius that he really wished he hadn't seen.

"Ew, Padfoot!" He began at a feeble attempt of clawing out his eyes. James snatched the picture away from him and snorted.

"Where did you get that negligee?" he wanted to know.

Sirius immediately ceased his bout of laughter to sharply answer, "Your mother."

And within mere seconds, the two boys were rolling around on the floor, trying to beat each other to a bloody pulp. Remus sighed and fell back onto his own, un-Valentine-covered bed and closed his eyes. Before he knew it, they had forgotten what they were fighting about. His two friends went back to reading out their cards. _67, 62, 71, 75, 89…_ Remus gave up and surrendered himself to reverie. Not that he thought Valentine's Day held any sincere significance or sacredness, but just once he would like to have someone tell him that they love him. It's all for the best, he supposed, because everything had gotten far too silly, anyway.

When he opened his eyes again, neither James, nor Sirius were there. His clipboard was gone, and he was no longer a young man lying in a dorm room. He was back from his memory, on his own and in his own room. On his bedside table there was a pink envelope. Inside of it, the red card smelt of chocolate.

_Happy Valentine's Day, Remus. _

_Love, _

_Tonks_

"One point for me," Remus whispered with a grin. Silly, he knew. But he had never really stopped counting points.

**A/N:** As much as I despise Valentine's Day, I've been sitting on this one for a while. Hope you enjoyed it!


End file.
